New York was the first stable environment I had. As a child I felt like we were always running, moving from house to house due to things I didn’t understand then. I lost count of the times I’ve had to introduce my self In front of a new classroom.
My husband’s family home, the one he grew up in as a child amazes me. Josh’s grandfather raised his father in the same house same. The same hallways that his dad once played in, Josh did as well. I’ve never seen such life being reborn again and again in the same home. To live your whole life, with the same friends, always feeling apart of something, truly is a blessing.
My mother in law passed a few weeks ago. Kind faces that came to say hello truly lifted our families spirits. What seemed like distant sunlight, hiding behind the blinds, found its way through the window, after we said our goodbyes. welcoming family along with lifelong friends of hers. I don’t know what any one would do without a thoughtful community surrounding them. You never truly understand how you can change someone’s day in with sweet words and gentle smiles.
I couldn’t call much on my family. They’re spread out all over. Its almost as if I have little pieces of me scattered around in various parts of the Caribbean, The United Kingdom, Canada and France. My one wish is to meet the faces that share the same last name as me. I need more, beyond their profile pictures and the squares that fill up their Instagram feed. Thats the community I’ve always looked for, but until then I must say…
I feel more supported than ever. Mostly from those I’ve never met. I’ve become more vulnerable and personal through my writing and I was embraced with virtual open arms left and right.
It wasn’t until I stepped both feet into the social media community had I realized how important being apart of something is.
I love what the online community has done for me, I’ve connected with many amazing mamas and colorful people this year. While social media has its positive side, I constantly catch myself drowning far out in the ocean trying to stay afloat so I can swim to shore, and stand next to the other mamas in this community. I think we have all been in that same ocean. It shows the human in us, the sensitive and the dire need for attention. We let the amount of likes and comments, define who we are. Questioning ourselves if we’re good enough, if we’re important or more special than the next. Try not to let your large or small following on Instagram define your self worth, but rather focus on the relationships that may enhance your life from it.We look up to the hundreds of large platforms and shout directly to them “pick me, pick me!” Many not chosen but the support never dies from the unheard, regardless of the predictable, patterned characters that represent our diverse tribe. We fail to notice the other thousands of stars in our community that shine just as bright. As hard as it may be, we must try to give mamas who deserve a chance, to feel like they belong.
It’s so easy to give up. there are times I want to call it quits and run away from projects and commitments I made within our growing community, but then I reconsider, because There’s something I want Ava to live by. So Ava, there is going to be a time When you feel like stepping down from your platform whether the crowd you see in front of you is big or small, but never forget there’s always someone who is looking up to you.
Despite the differences that lie openly in front of you it’s important to come as one and weave together a sturdy nest.
Make changes in your community, make it better, keep it standing strong and tall.
Try to acknowledge the hard work and love it takes to have something flourish, build as many people as you can. Use positive ingredients to produce a loving community.
To Alice, Ava’s sweet grandmother, you made sure no one, no matter how different, was ever left out, and your community remains strong in love. Rest in love and light.
This is my last Sling Diary entry. Many thanks to the Sakura Bloom Team, who are one the first to start such a powerful community and has opened doors for us all. Thank you for the opportunity, and choosing me to take part of this magical brand, these past six months will remain in my heart forever.
To my Sling Diary sisters who have inspired me, love and light to you all, this journey is just the beginning!
To everyone who has read my words and watched me unfold, I can’t thank you enough!
I’m wearing Ava in Simple Silk Pink Sand